DEFIANT TO THE END

Quite some time ago I recall watching the movie The Chronicles of Riddick, where the Necromongers were trying to convert the Furian [Riddick] ''now, bow to me'' says the grand master, and Riddick replies ''I bow to no man.'' Lately I've had a lot of reflection about my true nature, you see I'm an Aquarius and there are some attributes I just can't seem to shake off, I am rebellious by nature and it seems to be aiding me on my path to success with reality creation. Before learning about all things conscious creation, I was rebellious by nature as early as 15, but I was using it against myself instead of using it to my own personal advantage, thankfully I'm using it to my advantage and here's how it's worked for me so far, before, when I was employed, I always new there was something better, but fear kept me locked into the cell walls of drudgery, and a lot of times I hated the people I worked for, [with the exception of a few good jobs]and so when the weekend would come my rebellion would come out full force, in the form of over drinking, and cursing my job and my current reality. Now, my rebellious nature works for me, it has been four years of unemployment now, and it[rebellious nature] doesn't want to work for anyone anymore, the rebellious nature wants freedom from the status quo, rebellious nature doesn't like being told what to do, it doesn't like authority, it craves excitement and adventure, not conformity or struggle, it seeks no role models nor does it worship or emulate anyone, it knows what it doesn't want because it knows what it does want, is it ego or higher self? it's both, coming to a mutual agreement, working together to map out a life of freedom, success, and adventure, finding that common ground without discarding a now turned, positive natural trait. What worked against me before is now used to work for me, another example, I used to be a very head strong youngster when it came to personal pride, and I created a shell that grew thicker and thicker through the years, rebelling against religion, politics, and civil authority, and yet I would buy into all the false truths and fears of these very things I was rebelling against, even though I detested these things, I still believed what they were telling me, I was still buying into other's world views and beliefs. Now, I have simply woken up, I don't rebel against the said above things per se, I just don't waste my time and energy focusing on them, while still mind you, disagreeing on them heavily. All of this rebellion in the past has shaped who I am now, the only difference is I've found a way to use it to my own advantage, and quite possibly a greater cause. Some say the past doesn't define you, especially when you want to make positive shifts in your reality, I beg to differ, I'm beginning to realize that when it comes to my own personal past, I wouldn't change a thing! I wouldn't be who I am now, and who knows, had not certain things occurred, I may never have woken up and become the all I can be. I'm still a work in progress, but maybe this could be more fun than I thought, why take it all so seriously?, that was my problem before and even though my shell grew very thick over the years, it's slowly crumbling away as I write this post. I guess the message I'm bringing here is that when you opt for more in life and you want personal change for the better, you may keep certain characteristics that used to work against you, and as you improve they'll begin to work for you, and then there will be certain characteristics that will fall away in your personal development, that won't serve you anymore, and some may linger and become useful to assist you in getting what you want, then fall away when a goal or intention is achieved. As for this writer, keeping certain characteristics and shedding others makes for an interesting journey wouldn't you say? Brando movie anyone?