The burden of desire

Greetings everyone! welcome back to another post with the most, on deliberate creation and helping you all on my personal journey. While we all have a different approach and tecnique to this practice, it is my hope that my success is your success as well. Since I have jumped back into the vortex about a week ago I've been able to maintain this state successfully without doubts or negative thinking creeping in. The reason for this is I am finding my new positive thinking patterns are over-riding the negative thinking habbits I used to inflict apon myself, truly a transformation HAS taken place, when a not so pleasant thought tries to surface, I am able to stop it in it's tracks and pivot my thoughts and emotions to the desired place. This is a milestone for a student of deliberate creation, the negative thinking has no place in the creator's new thinking patterns, It's as if the positive motel has a sign reading ''no vacancy'' it's opposite of when I was a negative person, no positive could visit and stay. What I have discovered is this, letting go of the negative thinking was a big step, but I was still missing the mark of manifestation, then somehow I finally just got what I knew all along but failed to implement, I let go of my desires, I detached completely, have I given up on them? not at all, I just stopped trying to work  too hard and micro-manage everything during manifestation, without intending to, I was distancing myself from recieving, desire could'nt manifest. Letting go did'nt happen easily though, it took some serious mental and emotional discipline, but after a few days I began to feel free, light, in the present, and that unmistakable feeling of relief  was so good that it threw me right back into the vortex, {which is the same as ''being'' in the present} in the past year I was only able to hold this state on a temporary basis , even though I was practicing letting go, I still had'nt reached a level where  I was REALLY letting go. Here I was telling myself I could let go but then I would keep worrying and looking for clues of my goals and desires to show up, and the signs and clues did show up, but my ego just was'nt convinced, source energy was constantly telling me that it was a done deal, and I would be in confusion about the whole process, complicating things further. If we are to get into the good feeling of being in the present, feeling appreciation for where we are NOW, and feeling appreciation for the things we have NOW, and stay that course, we'll feel like we care less if our desire shows up or not, we can live without it, but it is in this state that desire DOES show up at the right place and time, I know this sounds counter productive to what we want, but this is a law, the law of detachment, crucial to manifestation practice! I've tried many times to let go, even when I thought I succeeded, I would come back to the frustrations of knowing I was'nt quite there yet, somehow, this time, it just happened, and I could tell by the way I felt, that I finally made it! Some think that letting go means giving up, far from the truth, you must let go, even if you work hard and accomplish a goal or desire, would'nt it be so much better to allow source to bring it in a way that's rewarding and fulfilling?, some struggle a lifetime to achieve limiting rewards, and then are too tired and unhealthy to enjoy the fruits of their labor, I've been there and done it, now, my life is easy, all my needs are met, and I have the time to do the things I love, no pressures, no deadlines, and wealth is beginning to show it's blessings at the right time, but the best part is, manifestations come faster and easier. This is all acomplished by letting go and living in the present, bieng content, and accepting where we are now, we all want better, we want more, but overall, we just want to be happy, the above is the anecdote to all that's complicated in life, you only have to ask once, as I said before in one of my posts, let it go and let it come!     Stay that course!