Spiritual speed bump

Greetings all!, first, my apologies for sometimes mis-spelling in my posts, I get so caught up in writing I don't always take the time to check over the spelling, I'll then hit ''publish'' and go back to read the written post only to catch a word or two mis-spelled, I do intend to rectify this minor glitch in future posts. Okay, the topic at hand, these past two weeks have been a rollercoaster of a ride, another bout of spiritual ''detox'' has blindsided me again, a few posts ago, I wrote about chemicalization, a ''side effect'' of doing spiritual work to become a deliberate creator, from this recent experience I've learned even more about how this happens and the effects at hand. This time however I noticed physical side effects, as of before this, the side effects were mostly emotional, although both were noticable, the toll they took were very draining on me physically. The wierd thing was one day I would be fine, the next really great, then the next just a plain downer, how I managed to do visualization is amazing!, but it did ease things up some, I was still in the creation process but also detoxing at the same time, funny part is, there were still small manifestations and even signs occuring, as in past detox experiences the opposite would manifest, what I did not want. Now I'm not saying this get's easier, it's how we deal with it that really is important, before I would go to pieces when this happened, the first thing that came to my mind was I don't know if I'm cut out for this it's too hard mentally, I want to give up! Then I discovered Emotional Freedom Tecnique, and that helped immensly, as a matter of fact, I still highly recommend it, but further in this journey, some very deep seated beliefs are rising up, and making things even more challenging. Here's the thing, it seems to me these deep, almost buried old programs that are taking my work to a whole new level are quite nasty, the side effects are nothing short of just plain wierd, they include sleepless nights, wierd dreams, good and bad, [no nightmares thankfully] mood swings such as depression, anxiety, other times you just want to ball your eyes out, you'll do anything to pre-occupy yourself to escape the rollercoaster ride of emotional chaos, these last two days I've been just physically exhausted! Now, is this as bad as it sounds?, am I falling apart?, it may seem so, but it's only temporary, and I'm gettin' through it, even better and stronger than ever! The first thing to remember is not to fight/resist this detoxing period, it is very wise to go easy on one self, understanding that it's a natural process and it WILL pass, believe me, those old gremlins will try to talk you out of breaking through by saying things like, ''you should'nt do this any more, it's too complicated, you are only setting up for dissapointment, you are not cut out for this stuff, join the rest of the human race and face reality!'' but at the same time there is the you that refuses to give up, ''I am a deliberate creator, and I will see this through!'' You can see why this can cause some serious disturbance in your body and spirit, and since the  subconcious work we are doing controlls all our bodily functions, well, you get the ideal. I honestly thought after two years of this journey that I had cleaned up most limiting and negative programming, only to dig up even deeper ones that were rooted, hey, we're talking about four decades of false beliefs to clean out of my subconcious! Each time I feel light and happy that I'm all cleaned up vibrationally, BAM! guess who? those deep seated beliefs and mild traumas come out to play, and they do not play nice! If you have had a lifetime of unserving negative and false beliefs, it is likely you may go through this as I am, but know that if you are very serious about changing your life for greater things, it's worth it, it ''is'' challenging mentally and physically, but a necessary stage in the deliberate creation process, trust me as I say, this is a good thing, as it means you are a step closer to your goals and desires, and each time you break through, you come out even stronger. Just remember, be gentle and forgive yourself, don't fight it, let it pass, and move forward......towards victory!    back soon!